happieness is a place

I finished college ,I got a job , I became a robotic zombie , I fell in love. I learned to dance the gangnam style .I caught the accent  ,I drank the vodkas ,I went to space, to zone ,I smoked a ciggy .I talked about politics, I voted for u .I quit smoking . I drank the coffee in Karmas coffee and sang a song or two in mojos park. I dated the prettiest girl. I slept with the one that gave it all. I lay awake still in bed hoping to do my best ,to be the best ,the next rock star the next coby Bryant .I want to be the next bill gates and spent my money but that I have not done. I have done it all I have done nothing .Wats next? Where to go?

Happiness is a place.i have to look for it .i want to  settle down there . I feel stuck now, Its been a few months that my girl friend has gone abroad for studies I find myself most of the time alone searching for direction of what I want out of my life. What do you want out of your life. What can we do to improve our life. These are a few steps that I know of and hope it helps you also . (I need this shit as much as you do).This is all of my wisdom from a depressed lazy ass shit man .take it if you want.

Please note that below is not a passage from a Buddhist book.It is not a lecture that you would hear from your parents or your boss .It is just a simple reminder for all of us to awaken the gentle spirit in all of us that makes our life simpler easier. It is to look at the simple things in life .

Meditate: Its only when u learn to listen to your heart that u will find true happiness .It is true. It is when u truly know how is that your brain works that you will know what happiness is all about. But please know that meditation can not be forced and it has to come naturally, to feel naturally.

Watch good inspiring Movies : Most of the people I know here in Thimphu are movie Buff. So watch a good movies.If you look at shitty stuff shitty things will get in and if you look at all the bright and beautiful things in  movies then u will get the best things.

Exercise : Your body is your temple ,as long as you are healthy your mentality will be happy as well.

Laugh and Joke : Do you have that certain some one who makes you laugh ,who makes you smile >Don’t let go off that person .Its not always about being serious life is too short to be sad .So laugh out loud.Go out of your way to find that joke that makes you laugh.

Express Your self : Always express your self ,of how you feel inside ,Be creative , be ambitious let it all out .Let it breathe free.

Sing : As loud as you can , you don’t need a good voice ,you are not here on an audition for a idol.You are her eto sing for your self and for your ears only.

Clean your place ,your self : Clean that shit up .no one likes a dirty slob. As long as you are clean your mind will be clean.The first step out of depression is to clean your self up.

Cant make every body happy all the time : Your father wants you to go get the groceries,Your mom wants to go to twon vit u.Your frens want to chill.Your girl friend wants u to cook for her.Set priorities.See which are important and which are just useless shit.and if it is always decline politely. No one has to be a door mat all the time.It does not make you a bad person.It just means you have your own shit to take care of like they have their own shit ot take care of . You cannot make all the people happy all the time.

Cook food and eat good food. : One of the best sources of relaxation for me to cook my own food and eat it. Basically what I am saying is eat good food ,have a full stomach meal and relax and tell me if that does not make you happy.

Donot stay all day in a dirty room doing nothing much /: This is for my self >Get up.Wash your self up .leave the laptop away and go out for a while .

Think positive when you wake up and when you go to sleep : This really works just when u wake up for 20 min think of all the good things you have in your life. Bethankful for all the things you have .And even when u are going to sleep do the same thing,that shit works like magic .

Love your loved ones with all the warmth inside : Life may be short, I don’t know I am just starting it but always take the time to let your special one know of all the love uhave inside for them.Thats the only thing that really makes sense in life. Other things come and go but its with the loved ones that you define your own life .So light a candle go for that dinner.Buy a present.Write that love letter.let out all the good ness all the warmth you have inside for the special loved one.

Be proactive. I don’t know what that really means but to me it means be prepared you know for any shit to come down.You got office ..boom you got ur clothes ironed your mind set ready shoes polished,,,You got party..boom …you got the shoes shined the mood all high and shit. So be proactive.

Be content : You got a cycle you will want a bike you got this youwill want that it goes on and on and on. Be content in wat you have.Always be grateful for wat u have and u will always smiel :D

Read a good book : Read Buddhism books knowledge is power.Read the kind of books that makes you say oh this is a good book .

Try and be nice to people  : not cause you are forced to do it and since the whole society makes u feel like u have to be nice > I mean no body died from people being nice to eachoteher .Saying hi heloow .sharing food  laughing all that .:D

Good music : listen to good music .The ones that u listen to .Since you have sucha  good taste and others don’t listen to what u listen to .

Drink occasionally:  drink like u are drinking because of the good taste u can feel in in ur body mind and soul and not to get drunk and wasted like a teenager looking to be wasted.Drink slowly drink smartly .drink occasionally.

 Be bold : tell me how to do it.

Do things you really want to do : I want to write ,sing and record ,play sports paint and make my living form either one of this.

Be laid back :There is no need for you to be the most popular the most seen the most happening person in town.U get tired of it .Wear a pajama sit at home read a book light a ciggy make a painitng .go meet a good friend .

Be calm and Breathe : nothing is as important as that all other things don’t really matter.Be calm breathe and shoot that shit head lol.Be calm and breathe.

This is it. : Your life is not happening when you get the next big job .it is not happening when u get the record deal .It is now .This is it .Take a look around things are beautiful .You are awesome and this is your life .make the most of it.

You are not your father brother sister or mother you are you embrace your self embrace your uniqueness .: The above line says it all >you are you. You are awesome. You are you’re your flaws you are you

Take risk : call that girl or boy you been wanting to .do the presentation . Sing the song .Do the shit .Take risk.

Its not always about the money : Money is important period but its not always about that. Its about breathing

Watch less tv

Worry less

Take a breath

smile

For today this is it

face it not facebook it

Oh what has the world come to? lol ...I spent the whole day staring at a box, days after days trying to find out about life through a box.Isnt my life out there?
i dont think uncle google would know  the taste of a coffee on a rainy sunday evening,reading by the window feel. He would explain it for sure but feel it, feel it,thats different ... on your tougue , ur pallete, the hot tea, the aroma , the sip u take , now thats different, now thats life :D

Face it not face book it.That short curly guy mark zuckerberg really did it. he created this super drug. i spent my whole day checking up on how people ate peanut for breakfast, how they wear different clothes and post it? ( labsa whats up vit that?) u know those girls that have this fashion Blog thing ,they literally change clothes one after another and post it. Waht am i supposed to do after looking at it? That pink jacket is nice but would have gone better with a blue shirt? Lol i mean to be honest i cant even decide what to wear on my nicest day ,so a shirt jean and bata slipper is it for  me . But i am not trying to judge or anything i mean every one has their own thing right so go on .

and another thing ,fashion pages on face book.Till now i have counted like 2000 bhutanese models ,every ones a model now on this fashion street or drukpa model or that thing.Ofcourse i wouldnt mind giving a few poses my self but until that doesnt happen i would say its stupid.

Ok back to face book ,it is addictive ,Morning comes up i have to log in to see my notifications of ap dorji eating his doma ,Am pema posing for the camera,Bum tashi taking thousands of pics to say that i am a model.I want to say that i am wise to know that i am not a part of it But i am guilty i facebook it not face it.We are all in it for the painfully sweet pleasure.

No wonder the government came up with the ban thing .I feel its bad addiction for the mind.remember those days man ,,those good old days where you would go out of your house and no one would have an idea of where you would be .You would be out there disconnected from the whole world yet be connected to all the people near you.It is like the coolest thing if you think abou it. The only way to call friends was through that one land line at home. and the awkward conversations when a girl would call and the whole familys eating in the didning room.

The kids now a days have it easy sure in most ways but they would never that raw feeling of having your snot in your mouth but still focusing it all on the marble.The days of going out to play in the morning and being called out by mom to come in .

The tantrums i throw around now when i dont get my datacard at home.The thoughts of what might ap dorji be doing? what is aum pem doing. its justgets tiring man.and the worst part is i go on days after days liking pictures of people i dont know saying hi to people who i might never meet and that has become my daily life.

 The times when my girl friend would get upset cause i didnt like her pic or comment. Or how i would get sad when she liked some other guys pic ,its just insane.I do let out my romantic side everynow and then on face book .On her wall i write ."You are thte prettiest thang i know and u better know it cause we make a bomb couple and we know it". I give my part of give and take.

Isnt love holy ?,love is pure and magical and i would do everything i can to prove my love for her but to show it to people around that doesnt give a rats ass?? 

Anyways i am deciding to give life more chance and not stare at the box for long. I am going to try and cut down on the net .Read books ,go out on adventures,make friends,laugh ,smile do something something rather then ::

Ap dorji : hi
Me : hi
a;how u doing
me: good how u doing....

Go and face it not face book it 

Such a lazy day and its mine ,,Such a lazy day in office and its mine

I got the idea for my post title from this song



I am not saying we should all be sad like that or anything its just a song .So If you feel lazy cause its the mid of the week and you just dont feel like working .If you are type of worker where you got hundreds of work pending but u just lazy to do stuff and act on it ,then i would u feel me .

So dont worry about a thing have fun smoke weed,drink and stuff and just dont give a fuck about shit . peace for now and sleep on it like a boss .So here is some more laid back relaxed song that makes my day for you.

things i wish i knew ,,,its from the net :D

56 Things I Wished I’d Known When I was Younger '( frrom the net)

I wish I’d known that failure was an option.
I wish I’d known there’s a difference between friends and drinking buddies.
I wish I’d known honesty, in all situations, is always, always, always the best policy.
I wish I’d known how to grow a pair and be more assertive.
I wish I’d known how to feel comfortably weird about being a little weird.
I wish I’d known how much my mum and dad really loved me, and all the warnings I got came from a place of love.
I wish I’d known that my thoughts don’t have to dictate my life.
I wish I’d known that home really is where the heart is.
I wish I’d known that intelligence is not something you’re born with, it’s something that can be worked on.
I wish I’d known that being positive can really change your thoughts which can indeed change your life.
I wish I’d known how to be myself more and not tried to imitate Tom Cruise’ (Top Gun) confidence (Although singing, ‘You’ve lost that Loving Feeling’ to girls sometimes did work :) )
I wish I’d known that the jacket of life could be altered to suit me.
I wish I’d known how to say No!
I wish I’d known that the phrase ‘just try it’ should apply to everything we do in life.
I wish I’d known that not being perfect is okay, and, in fact, striving for perfection is an impossible task.
I wish I’d known that not being ‘well off’ didn’t mean I didn’t have a rich life.
I wish I’d known that losing myself in a book wasn’t a substitute for living.
I wish I’d known that my thoughts actually control how I feel, and how I feel affects the way I see the world.
I wish I’d known that sex is a physical act and that love is something different altogether.
I wish I’d known that having two strong sisters was a blessing.
I wish I’d known that formal education was only one option in life and not the only, or best, option.
I wish I’d known that starting a business didn’t require as much planning or money as I’d thought.
I wish I’d known never to settle for second best, whether it be in relationships, product choice, or employment.
I wish I’d known that loving yourself was a pre-requisite to truly loving others.
I wish I’d known how to plan my finances better.
I wish I’d known that everything I ever stressed out about would not matter one year later.
I wish I’d known that TV numbs the mind.
I wish I’d known that my mistakes would define me as the person I am today.
I wish I’d known that perfection is never going to happen.
I wish I’d known never to actively participate in gossip, it’s the black death of the soul.
I wish I’d known that nobody can be changed, no matter how hard you try to change them. People change because the pain of changing is less than the pain of not changing.
I wish I’d known how to express my love more.
I wish I’d known that my regrets in life stopped me from moving on. When it’s done, forget it and move on.
I wish I’d known that helping others was the real path to helping every area of my own life, business, and personal.
I wish I’d known that change is inevitable, and rather than fighting it, I should have befriended it.
I wish I’d known not to waste my time and mental energy on people who didn’t matter in my life.
I wish I’d known that life is a balance and I dictate the ratios.
I wish I’d known that it’s okay not to know everything.
I wish I’d known to live in the moment, and not in the future or the past.
I wish I’d known that trusting myself would allow great things to happen.
I wish I’d known that not all people are bad, but not all people are good either.
I wish I’d known that what’s right for me is not necessarily right for others.
I wish I’d known that although responsibility can seem scary, when embraced it gives understanding acceptance and choice.
I wish I’d known that one of lifes skills is to be able to spot genuine people.
I wish I’d known that things have to come to an end to be able to experience new, exciting things in the future.
I wish I’d known that learning doesn’t finish when you leave school.
I wish I’d known how to trust my instincts more.
I wish I’d known that the world is as big as you allow it to be.
I wish I’d known that I had choices, and my route may need to change but perseverance always got me through.
I wish I’d known that the world does not owe you any favours, you have to step up to the plate and be counted.
I wish I’d known that happiness is not defined by financial wealth.
I wish I’d known the importance of working out what was right for me.
I wish I’d known that all actions, always have a consequence.
I wish I’d known that my needs and desires would change over time.
I wish I’d known that doing what I wanted to do was not necessarily me being selfish.
I wish I’d known that where you are born does not dictate where you will end up in life.

Starts with a whistle

Recently have been seeing a lot of cases on molestation and how sad people can get,I remember an incident in Tashigang in a bar,and how i wrote this piece once i got home drunk,how it all starts from a whistle..

...and as i walk through the dusty lanes and enter the bar,,
a very typical shady bar ,dim lights, dirty wall,
it is filled in with men all eagerly awaiting for their turn to whistle,,cause it mostly starts with a whistle,,,
The girls looks barely 16 years of age ,all four of them ,,
 but seems used to the vulgar abuses from the whistlers.
the girls grown accustomed are quick on reply ...
As my whisky flows inside my empty stomach ,and i get lost in the silence of my drink
 ,the whistlers have now started to grope the girls,,,
the girls in return scowls the whistlers but i do see a hint of smile on the girls faces,,
SO young so naive basking in the glory of the attention poured upon by the whistlerss.
and the whistlers looking for every chance to go along with,,,

my whisky is over now ,i tell the little girls that the whistlers are no good and the whistlers are too drunk to hear anything while the girls give me the look of they know better ,,lol i head on out facing the cold wind and looking for a older girl to whistle to.:P

The Rocker Chick

You can be as beautiful as the white swan or be as hot as the hot oven it self ,,but if there is a rocker chick standing by then its ba bye. There is something about a rocker chick, who  bares all of  herself on the stage that just clicks for me .

For instance i went out with my frens to a show where a local singer was singing and he invited any body from the audience to come up and sing.There was this pretty girl who came out from the crowd and just about started singing songs from random zombie to adele.

Agreed, that her voice was not very good but when she was up on the stage , all eyes fixed on her ,the dim light ,the rythmic guitar playing in the back ,every one high on alcohol and life and with her rocker chick attitude the night was alive.

Though the night didn't turn pretty well for me ,through out it all ,i was still mesmerized by the girl on the stage and it was all that was on my mind through out the night.

You can be as ugly as a worn out saga ( ginger) but if u can let out ur soul through the music and you have the spirit within you to let it out infront of people, to be not bothered by what they think then its a A1 in my book for you .

There is no harm in creating and expressing through the touch of music rather than trying to be the next wanna be model for victoria secret and be next miss popular.So take out the guitar and just play on .lolll

Here are a few videos  of joan jett 

.

pessimistic view of a hypocritical bastard

I been blank for ten minutes now thinking wat I should write about ………………………………….. ok here it goes ….I may be the nicest person u will meet,I will smile at u be polite ,u might say he is cool but well here it is ……… ………..,, ,, I don’t want to be nice for the sake of it but wel the society deems me mad if I am not , its all the pessimistic view of the hypocritical bastard……….
well lets see….. wat did I do yesterday ,,nothing much I guess sleep all day ..mm how about write about some crappy love story ,,well where is the love these days? every one is after the best cars,training programme , or the masters thing,its like a robotic line thing ,,school ,college, rcsc, work ,masters.. I can see my self there after 50 yrs…what happened to not knowing where life is going ?not knowing where u will be in the next 5 yrss. NOW its all about another brick in the wall ,,another one bites the dust ,. And and I forgot the car loan thing ,,,buy a car and slave for 5 yrs absolutely free…
. And don’t u dare tell me” you are young ,you don’t have the responsibilities towards any one ,you can be free live your life”,,,if u are one of those good hearted monks and or the smooth talking counselors I might just slap you slap u hardd ,wat about the fucked up society that judges you, wat about how I eat or wat I wear ,, if I had a fairy god mother I would be a writer ,a singer, a but I don’t have one and don’t u dare tell me how to live my life,,
I stayed up the whole last night drinking and u know why I drink ,,,to forget this whole fucked up thing called life………no I don’t want to be the bosss chamcha ,no I don’t want to gossip about the the same people at lunch…I don’t want to do the same things over and over and over again and complain about how boring life is a typical 9 to 5 ……. Just yesterday I stayed up the whole day staring at face book stalking people looking at pictures ,,that has wat life has come down to ,,looking at how people live in a cube box


y do u look at me like I am an alien all I did was just walk out in to grab a cup of coffee…am I supposed to be polished all the time? Gosh I cant keep up ,,my hairs messed up at times ,,my clothes are dirty ,I haven’t bathed in a week ,,and I cant look like ur film crush all the time….

….and parents!!! u tell me smoking is bad how about the fact that u drink every night ,how about the fact that ur silentness and ur bitter cry outs makes me want to not stay at home ,,one looking at u and I feel that lifes not worth living for ,,you are the saddest person and I gotta look up to u ,,god save me……. All u do on a Sunday is keep staring at the box the whole day ,,u make me feel tht I have ruined ur life ,,gosh I am never having childrennn

,,,,,,,,,,wow u live in thimphu ,,it must be good ,,yup…people racing against time to be the richest ,,, u r not a person if u aint at the hottest joint ,the most happening club ,,driving the coolest car ….every corner u turn there is the next wanna be model the nba player ,the high class English speaking I am too cool to be in my under wear at winter chick…….no wonder there is stabbing every where ,,u drive in suv I walk u look down on me , if feel disgusted at myself ,I stab the next person,,election democracy,,who gives a rats ass I wanna know where can i steal some branded jeanssss,,,,,
I wake at 8 ,, stare in silence till 830go to office at 9 stare at an empty box till 5 watch people walk by ,,gosh I been lonely ,,,why don’t u get a girl my frens say? Well I want to but they are out there being the hippest the collest being out vit the rich and famous ,,I had sex yesterday just sex nothing else ,,I sneaked out at 12 ,,……
how do u expect me to do a presentation why my hearts about to explode ,,I have anxiety ,,heart palpitation ,, depression ,,,no tht cant be true we live in a gnh society where one is happy and content..lol…..
wai he is churii ,if u listen to some crappy songs or mispronounce a word ,or wear odd clothes,, I am so high fi ,I speak English ,,trust me I know as much as u do even more vocab may be ,,but u know I been speaking dzongkha for so long it takes second for me to translate the thing until it comes out so I feel a lil inferior but u can go fuck ur self like I give a rats ass

shit I heard life is like a b grade movie and its true ,u are at home watching a movie but u cant relax the fucking anxiety si killing me and u expect me to be nice I might just slap you….. don’t tell me about ur problems I got enough of mine ..i don’t care ……………………………………………… I might be the person next to u the nicest person u know fuck!!!